National Service

Hubby is doing his reservist training this week. Usually, if he books out every day, I'm pretty okay with it. This time, although a short one (1 week compared to the usual 2 weeks), is inclusive of an exercise, so he is required to stay in for 2 nights.

Last nite, he had to book in by 12am, so I was very depressed to see him go. After saying goodbye at the lift, I went to the corridor beside the refuse chute to catch a glimpse of the car leaving. He slowed down in front of our block, I didn't know why, I couldn't see. Later on, he told me in sms that he was waving at me. I was so angry with myself for being so stupid.

Today I have taken medical leave. I just couldn't get out of bed with that rock in my brain. Have been feeling groggy since yesterday. Fever came and went, temperature is fine now but I feel feverish, weak, nose stuffy, head feels funny, throat dry. Doc says I'm probably having a slight flu. all I need is plenty of rest.

I'm also serving my national service, but mine is just the beginning of a lifetime commitment. I can't wait for the day to see my baby, but it also scares me that I am responsible for another person's life, at least for the next 21 years.

I don't know how to rest properly. I got so much work waiting for me to do in school. And I really miss my hubby. I wish I could just drop everything and rest at home.

One more lonely night to go.